Q & A
The late Pope John Paul II and Beef respond to your queries.
Q: How did you get the nickname "Beef"?
A: From football.
Q: No but like, how in football?
A: Me and my good friend Cam Smith were starting on the varsity offensive line our sophomore year. We were both rather large sophomores. Big guys who hang out together...Beef Brothers. Fast forward to that summer, Camwise bolts for greener pastures, leaving only Beef on the West Side. At the greatest place on earth, yours truly is pressed for a nickname by campers. Answer: Beef. Result: A generation of young 'ins know me as no other.
Q: Why did you bother putting up this website?
A: 1. Sometimes, something other than college football is on the brain 2. which needs distracting from constant stream of emo/punk/garage music in Drackett Tower 3. and FrontPage is dang easy to use even for non-computer-savvy individuals.
Q: Don't you have a girlfriend or a job?
A: A girlfriend? You don't know the Beefster as well as you think you do. A job--well, I go to work every day, 7 days a week, a lot of times until 9 or 10 or later. Not sure if it counts as a "job" if you don't get paid--but the press box seats are nice.
Q: What's with the dancing bananas?
A: Would you rather have pictures of Beef dancing?
Q: Touché.
Q: How often do Beef Thoughts come around?
A: Usually the seed is planted during walks back from the Recreational Physical Activities Center (RPAC, the arse-shredder for short) 'round 1-ish AM. Exercise has a way of toying with the mind, and the sooner that convoluted logic can make its way onto Word, the sooner it gets to your prying eyes. Roughly once a week.
Q: What if I want to be in/on Beef Thoughts?
A: The only requirement is that you rock hard tasty abs washerboard style. Guest thoughts, commentaries, criticisms, hate mail/death threats can be sent to needham.34@osu.edu. That's a real e-mail address, people.
Q: You suck and I hate your site.
A: Go Buckeyes!